A Duck Fan’s Guide to Reading a John Canzano Sports Column

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Many Duck fans approach a column written by Oregonian sportswriter John Canzano with trepidation. I prefer to approach them with a lit match or a recycle bin (hey, I went to school in Eugene).  Speaking of incendiary, the point of most columns is to spark debate, and this is where many green readers get burned.

Canzano, like most columnists, considers an issue from which a consensus seems to have been formed.  He then argues the other side of the issue. This is how many Duck fans end up being convinced he hates our team.  It’s also how many Beaver fans have come to add the man to their bandwagon (okay, if we’re being honest, it’s more like a band-coupe).

So the key to getting through one of The Bald One’s pieces is to realize that he isn’t rewarded for agreeing with you or even being logical.  His job is to irritate you, maybe even view an issue from a different angle, or to make you thankful that his waxed dome is relegated to print and radio and off the TV for six days a week.  Don’t get rankled.  Consider the validity of his point, and remember if what he writes isn’t controversial people won’t talk about it. When all else fails, you can always do what I do, read the title and wait to hear the outraged summary from the sucker who drags himself through the whole piece.

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Gabe Judah

Gabe Judah

Gabe Judah is a high school educator, two time UofO graduate, a frenzied father of two, a fortunate husband of one, and a thoughtful fan of Duck athletics. While at the UofO, Gave pitched for the club baseball team, but perhaps his greatest contribution to Oregon sports was when he helped a Sporting News All-American safety pass a 200 level Spanish class.

  • Badwater

    Clownzano considers issues? That would require cognitive thought. That would require neural synapses. “Clownzano thinking” is an onymoron. Never forget that.

  • acivicduck

    Also consider this: if you really p*ss him off, he may just challenge you to a fight via email. I’ve got the proof.

    Worthy of a few giggles, like most things associated with the buffoon.

  • http://www.facebook.com/doug.mai.3 Doug Mai

    Great picture of the CLUELESS WONDER by the way, I have fun with the guy, cause I leave voice message’s on his voice mail so of coarse he’d never call me back cause I’ve never given him a reason to, I mean that is if you enjoy abuse LOL!