Father’s Day Gift List for Fans Around the Country

While most people know FishDuck as being the preeminent source of innovative knowledge about all things sport having to do with the University of Oregon (as well as Philadelphia, wink wink say no more) what most do not realize is that FishDuck is also a leading research and analysis firm with respect to societal opinion.

We have partnered with the Law Offices of Probum, Fleasome, and Runn to do market research about the inner-most desires of fans around the country this Father’s Day.  Some of what we discovered may surprise you.

While many guys acknowledged that all they really wanted was to be left alone to watch the final round of the U.S. Open.

I admit it.  This is me.

www.lifehealth.com

I admit it. This is me.

 

Some sports fans had some very specific desires for this holiday that they were willing to share with our crack staff.

Rutgers University:  It’s been quite a slog for the State University of New Jersey.  First it was their men’s basketball coach hurling balls and abuse at his team, then it was the athletic director fired in the wake.  Rutgers hired an athletic director, who it was learned, had called her players “whores, alcoholics and mentally disabled” when she was the volleyball coach at Tennessee.  In light of all that they have gone through, Rutgers fans have but one desire this Father’s Day.  That is to …

Please, Signed Scarlet Knights

commons.wikimedia.org

Please, Signed Scarlet Knights

 

Cal Tech:  The students at Cal Tech are remarkably intelligent.  Truly, graduates from Cal Tech will be some of the leaders that shape the world in the century to come.  Sadly, the California Institute of Technology Division III basketball team lost 310 consecutive games, spanning an astounding 26 years.  During two of those years the Beavers (and that’s the last time I want to associate THAT with academic excellence) of Cal Tech started a center whose program height/weight was 6’3″/161.  Tired of having to chant “You will beat us today, but you will work for us tomorrow” Cal Tech hoop fans have but one wish this Father’s Day:

"At center for YOUR Cal Tech Beavers..."

espn.go.com

“At center for YOUR Cal Tech Beavers…”

 

University of Washington:  Things are looking up for the Huskies and I, for one, am glad.  They have a new fight song

 

At their current pace the Huskies will be back on top … sometime.  When you get down to it, the aggrieved Husky fan probably doesn’t have enough years left in the old ticker to see his team get back to national prominence.  That’s why when Husky Fan was asked what he most wanted to have for Father’s Day his response was somewhat predictable.

"Set Target for Don James, Scotty!"

revisitanautilus.ro

“Set Target for Hugh McElhenny, Scotty!”

 

Happy Father’s Day, gentlemen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Kim Hastings

Kim Hastings

Kim Hastings is a 1984 graduate of Northwest Christian College. He cut his journalistic teeth as sports editor of a paper in his home town of Fortuna, CA, and, later as a columnist for the Longview Daily News in Longview, WA. He saw his first Oregon game in 1977 and never missed a home game from 1981 until a bout with pneumonia cut his streak short in 1997. He was one of the proud 3200 on a bitterly cold night in Shreveport, Louisiana in 1989 for the Independence Bowl, and continues to be big supporter of Oregon sports. He is an active participant on the various Oregon Ducks messageboards as "TacomaDuck."