A group of rich white men banded together because they didn’t want to pay taxes. No, not just recently. I’m talking about 238 years ago at the time of the American Revolution. The end result of that decision — which, if you’ve ever walked the Freedom Trail in Boston you know, was mostly arrived at in taverns —
was the beginning of this great experiment in representative democracy that we know as the United States of America. Certainly not every decision the country decided upon was a good one.
But for the most part (There aren’t any Native Americans around are there?) the country has soldiered on in a manner more right than wrong. One of the reasons for our relative success as a country is because of some of the documents that were penned at the very beginning. Among these were the Declaration of Independence. FishDuck.com had its annual summer gathering in Tahoe last week. Over lobster thermador we decided that Thomas Jefferson’s signature document could be adapted to college sports.
1. We Hold These Truths to Be Self-Evident: This would be things about which no one could honestly argue. On message boards we often start pure opinion with “it goes without saying.” That’s what Jefferson was doing here. College sports examples would be “Eugene is a more attractive city than Tucson,” or “Washington’s Tyee Club is Dante’s Seventh Circle of Hell.”
2. That All Men are Created Equal: T.J. wasn’t afraid to bend the truth just a little was he? “Oh Sally? She’s my … nanny. That’s the ticket.” All men are NOT created equal. Some are faster, stronger, and decidedly better looking than others.
3. That They are Endowed by their Creator with Certain Inalienable Rights, that Among These are Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness: I … guess. As long as by ‘pursuit’ you realize that some things will just never be.
4. That to Secure These Rights, Governments are Instituted Among Men:
God Bless America, and especially, the Ducks of the University of Oregon and All Who Love Her.
Top Photo by flickr.com
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