1 ) DUCKS UNLIMITED IS TO DUCKS AS …
- a butcher shop is to hogs.
- a glue factory is to horses.
- a Korean restaurant is to dogs.
2 ) PUDDLES IS BEST KNOWN FOR …
- being androgynous.
- push up prowess.
- goosing Lee Corso.
3 ) WHICH COACHING STAFF HAS THE BEST HANDLE ON THE DUCKS OFFENSE?
- the 49ers
4 ) THE DUCKS ARE PLAYING UC DAVIS BECAUSE …
- Mike Bellotti played there.
- Mike Bellotti coached there.
- PORTLAND ST is too good.
- LINFIELD COLLEGE did not have an open date.
5 ) IN THE 2nd HALF OF THE ALAMO BOWL THE OREGON COACHING STAFF RELIED UPON …
- the Mike Leach School of Clock Management.
- the Sonny Dykes School of Play Calling.
- The FAB FIVE School of Time Out Management.
- the Dabo Swinney School of Special Teams Management.
- All of the above
6 ) TRUE or FALSE
If Puddles hooked up with Daisy, Donald would go Goofy.
7) IN THE 2nd HALF OF THE ALAMO BOWL …
- Puddles arms atrophied.
- Frogs got horny.
- the Ducks’ center thought he was playing on a putting green.
8 ) WHO WOULD BE ODDS ON TO WIN A PUSH UP CONTEST?
- Chris Berman
- Hillary Clinton
- Stephen Hawking
9 ) THERE IS AN NCAA RULE THAT SAYS …
- Duck QBs are not allowed to take a snap from under center.
- Royce Freeman must be saved for golf season.
- Ducks LBs must take classes at the U of Juarez Matador School.
10 ) THE MOST HERCULEAN TASK IS …
- President Obama bringing peace to the middle east.
- staying horny enough to keep up with the Kardashians.
- Brady Hoke’s attempt to repair a screen door on a submarine.
11 ) SEEING WHERE THE DUCKS DEFENSE FINISHED NATIONALLY, OREGON SHOULD …
- drop the D from Ducks.
- drop the D and replace it with an S.
- drop the D and replace it with Schm.
BUT SERIOUSLY DUCKS FANS!!!!!!!
Hats off to the Oregon coaches and players for:
Going 9-4 after losing the Heisman winning QB and battling numerous injuries to key players;
Refusing to quit (especially Doug Brenner and Jeff Lockie) and taking TCU into a 3rd OT;
For the D (especially the secondary) showing consistent improvement under coach Pellum;
For having the guts in 2016 to schedule 2 Power 5 teams out of conference; and
Sustaining a decade of excellence.
Can’t wait for Spring Ball and teeing it up vs UC Davis!
GO YOU FIGHTING DUCKS!!
Top Photo by Kevin Cline
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