Oregon’s Brenner Faces Stiff Competition for S.I. Player of the Year

Kim Hastings FishWrap, FishWrap Archive

As many of you know Oregon multi-sport star Liz Brenner is up for Sports Illustrated female athlete of the year.  You can help Ms. Brenner to victory by going to  http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/college-athlete-of-the-year/ and casting your vote.

Brenner With the Block!

Brenner With the Block!

 

Liz’ task will not be easy however.  Here is a look at some of the stiff competition that she will face to be named to this prestigious honor.

 

Corny Unitard

Corny Unitard

 

The University of Washington entrant into the contest is Corny Unitard.  Standing 15 hands tall and weighing in at 540 pounds Ms. Unitard competes in running away from reality and engaging in competitive self delusion.  She is the youngest contestant in the field as are all students enrolled at U-Double-Oooh.

 

Justine Beauregard

Justine Beauregard

 

Oregon State’s candidate for female athlete of the year is 22 year old senior Justine Beauregard.  Ms. Beauregard majors in Animal Husbandry and minors in Sheep Dip.  Her claim to fame is the 2012/13 Pac-12 Plowing Championship belt that she won just last week.  She would like to thank her parents, Furrow and Beetle, for their inspiration and guidance.

But the most surprising name in the field for female athlete of the year was

Mark Emmert

Mark Emmert

 

Competing as an “at-large” competitor due to his absolute impartiality and even handedness, Emmert surprised his co-workers when he declared himself a woman for the purposes of this competition.  When asked about the development Emmert’s wife said, “Actually this answers a lot of questions that I’ve had.”

Vote for Liz!

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