I’m Broke! Should I Be a Beaver?

Kim Hastings FishWrap, FishWrap Archive Leave a Comment

I’m broke.

Will skewer the Beavers for food

pixabay.com

Will skewer the Beavers for food.

I won’t always be broke. It’s a temporary condition due to spending too much on my own birthday and the fact that my stock options with FishDuck (FKU:NYSE) and 401k don’t vest for another year. But being broke, for no matter how long, makes one wonder, “Did I go wrong in my life? Should I have made better choices? What if I had become … a Beaver?”

Sure there would have had to have been an adjustment in the way that I look at the world.

I would have had to be okay with a logo that stands for "Oh S%*t."

posterplanet.net

I would have had to be okay with a logo that stands for “Oh S%*t.”

And I would have needed to find something more interesting than college football to do on Saturdays in the fall.

Church potluck in Corvallis

en.wikipedia.org

Church Potluck in Corvallis

But I could have done I t… couldn’t I?

Probably the hardest thing, besides all of the other things, that I would have had to do was get used to making excuses. Now excuses aren’t purely the purview of Beavers.

Oklahoma makes them:

 

Florida State makes them:

"I thought the crab legs at Publix was part of my scholarship."

gamedayr.com

“I thought the crab legs at Publix were part of my scholarship.”

But to be a Beaver I was going to have to become a master of the excuse. I was going to have to be better at making excuses than this guy,

Hugh Grant

commons.wikipedia.net

Hugh Grant

who “dated” this gal,

Divine Brown-Curbside Entrepreneur

bigbeefco.com

Divine Brown-Curbside Entrepreneur

while being in a relationship with someone truly divine.

Elizabeth Hurley

commons.wikimedia.org

Elizabeth Hurley

And that would be hard.

Sigh. I don’t know what to do. Align myself with the state’s most prestigious University on and off the field of sporting endeavor? Or spend Saturday afternoons cheering on the Bad News Bears in a half empty stadium surrounded by a couple thousand fans who get dental and fashion advice from Gollum.

"TEEFS!"

en.wikipedia.org

“TEEFS!”

I’ve made up my mind. Broke is but a temporary state of being. Beaver lingers forever.

GO DUCKS!

Top photo by clipartcotttage.deviantart.com

 

 

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