I am an old man. As an old man, I have the right, nay the responsibility, to take losses hard. After all, there are fewer victories in my future than in the future of, for example, my editor.
This discussion of my age explains, in part, my reaction to our loss against Ohio State the other night. I can only imagine how Charles Fischer took the loss, as he is older than me.
How hard did I take the trip to the woodshed administered by the only Oregon State University that counts?
So I went to an expert on loss and the aftermath thereof. Famed author Elizabeth Kubler-Ross from Friends helped me work through it with “The 5 Stages of Grief.”
1. Denial: Good teams who win the turnover battle by four T.O.s don’t lose games.
2. Anger: “Since we seem to be unable to hit anyone in uniform, I hope someone lays Urban Meyer out!”
3. Bargaining: “Dear Lord, if you could help us get a third down stop I will declare my FishDuck.com swag on my income taxes.”
4. Depression: “Balls.”
5. Acceptance: Though we may never sip from the cup of the national championship trophy, we are nevertheless the Ducks of the University of Oregon. As such we are blessed to share our allegiance with the finest and most knowledgeable fan base in the land, and probably the most exciting team to appear on the gridirons of American football. Each fall our hope will renew and our fervor will re-ignite. Why? Because we’re the Ducks!
Da-da-da-da-DA! Go Ducks go!
Da-da-da-da-DA! Fight Ducks fight!
Da-da-da-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA WIN DUCKS WIN!
Top photo by en.wikipedia.org