Three years, nine months, and 18 days ago I was asked to submit a column for a new website called FishDuck.com. In the 197 weeks since, I contributed 197 pieces to the site. Wednesday morning I received a call from The Big Fish himself telling me this will be the last regularly scheduled edition, at least for now wink, wink, say no more, say no more.

www.geograph.org.uk
Alas
In the years of my association with FishDuck.com/notsurewhytheyweresohornyforitalics I have made some good friends. I’ve had some fun at the expense of our opponents and made people whom I respect laugh until milk comes out of their nose.

www.funnyjunk.com
What is better than that?
Before I leave, I want to thank some people. On Sept. 3, 2011, there were only three of us. The one with the vision was Charles Fischer. He has been the driving force behind the site from the get-go. It was his dream that spawned the site. It was his money that kept the site afloat. When we have our company good-bye on Catalina Island next month, I will probably give him a big wet kiss.

commons.wikimedia.org
Comin’ atcha, Big Guy.
I want to thank the various editors who have helped make my stuff look good. It has been a pleasure, almost all the time, working with you folks. Shout out to Dano Dunn.

en.wikimedia.org
Since we have some free time after Catalina Island, I will be at your house for a salmon barbecue very soon.
I would also like to thank the fans of the various teams I have skewered over the last 3.5+ years. I have learned a lot about your team traditions. I didn’t know the University of Virginia was founded by Thomas Jefferson until it was time for us to play them. My research into the third President of these United States revealed the married Jefferson to be a kind, albeit morally ambiguous, man. He was especially kind to Sally Hemings, a favored slave girl. But Virginia Cavalier fans know their team’s history and sing the unofficial fight song.
Seriously, it was never my intention to insult as much as it was to shine the bright light of twisted humor on the teams we played.

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But the Beaver fans were asking for it when they rushed the field because they beat the spread in a 24-17 loss to New Mexico.
Honesty compels me to say I enjoyed needling the Huskies more than any other team. We have muzzled them, and I never thought it would happen in my lifetime. In days long past, I thought I could die a happy man if we ever beat them two years running.

en.wikimedia.org
Now, who knows how many years the streak will live?
But, before I go, let me say one last thing to the loyal, and even the casual, readers of my work. Thank you from the bottom of my being. It has been my pleasure coming to you each and every Saturday morning for almost four years. God Bless you for the kind words. I have treasured each of them in my heart. Now, allow me to give the last word to the person who has been my executive assistant since the beginning.

flickr.com
Go Ducks!
Top photo by rointheknow.com