1. Is new UGA coach Kirby Smart’s nickname:
Here he comes to save the day.
a. ‘Get;’
b. ‘Not Too;’
c. ‘Wicked?’
2. If no one showed for a Coach Saban press conference would he:
a. yell at the Coke bottle;
b. yell at the Dasani bottle;
c. yell at both bottles?
Too many options.
3. If Nick Saban coaches ALABAMA through 2030;
a. no one will agree to coach the other SEC teams;
b. he will be the wealthiest person in the state of Alabama;
c. he will own the state of Alabama?
4. A Google Earth Search of Tuscaloosa most closely resembles downtown:
a. Kabul;
b. Mogadishu;
c. Pyongyang?
5. Just because ESPN owns the SEC Network does not mean that it is:
a. biased;
b. prejudiced;
c. headquartered in Paul Finebaum’s Man Cave?
Mr. Finebaum is not amused.
6. Did the Head Ball Coach:
a. bail on the Gamecocks;
b. bolt on the Gamecocks;
c. pull a Houdini on the Gamecocks?
Ball is life.
7. When the Alabama equipment manager lends money to a player the interest rate is:
a. zero;
b. zilch;
c. nada?
This is Vandy’s year.
8. When the Alabama equipment manager lends money to a player the due date is:
a. when Nick Saban laughs out loud on TV;
b. when Jesus returns;
c. when Vandy wins the national championship?
Really?
9. Does sh-t passing through a tin horn:
a. exceed the speed of light;
b. render the instrument unplayable;
c. always fall on the head of a November FCS opponent?
10. Who spreads the most male bovine excrement?
a. Jeff Long;
b. Bill Hancock;
c. LSU’s AD?
Pick me!
11. On New Year’s Eve did Jimmy Kimmel watch the playoff games with:
a. Bill Hancock;
b. the UGA mascot;
c. a USC Song Girl?
12. What is Bret Bielema’s number 1 goal in 2016?
a. to jump on his wife without smothering her;
b. to stop CAL players from jogging;
c. to beat Toledo?
Nailed it.
Top photo from Video
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Jon Joseph grew up in Boston, Massachusetts but has been blessed to have lived long enough in the west to have exorcised all east coast bias. He played football in college and has passionately followed the game for seven decades. A retired corporate attorney Jon has lectured across the country and published numerous articles on banking and gaming law. Now a resident of Aiken South Carolina, Jon follows college football across the nation with a focus on the Conference of Champions and the Ducks.
