Dear Ducks: If Ever, Let It Be This Week

Kim Hastings Humor 1 Comment

“We compete against ourselves.” “We play them one game at a time.” “Our opponents are faceless.”

Middle linebacker for Arizona State

grist.org

Middle linebacker for Arizona State.

These are all axioms you have heard from football coaches from Pee Wee ball to the NFL. They are ways of saying no one opponent is any more important than any other opponent. You may have heard people say that about the Ducks and Huskies. Respectfully …

Did you know species of bull can be identified by their excrement?

boards.straightdope.com

Did you know species of bull can be identified by their excrement? 

Oh, some of you will cite the Civil War. But, after the Civil War the Beavers will still have the sense of hopelessness that can only come from knowing life as one big …

Welcome to Corvallis

commons.wikimedia.org

Welcome to Corvallis.

The Husky game is the be-all and end-all of the 2015 season. Why? Because I am tired of being so damn popular.

Selfie

en.wikimedia.org

Selfie.

Popular, you ask? What does the football season thus far have to do with my popularity? Well, I live in the Seattle area. For over a decade now, I have serenely worn Duck gear around the Puget Sound.

Go Ducks!

en.wikimedia.org

Go Ducks!

No one said a word.

Shhh, you mangy mutts. Ssshhhhh...

commons.wikimedia.org

I lived in a cone of silence.

Now everyone in town wants to talk football with me.

Now everyone in town wants to talk football with me.

commons.wikimedia.org

“*&%^$*&^%$#@(& you. YOU SUCK hahahahahahahaha.”

So, to the players, coaches, training staff, spiritual guidance and janitorial membership of the University of Oregon Fighting Ducks, I beg of you …

Beat Washington!!!

Top Photo by rescue.ceoblognation.com

Print Friendly, PDF & Email

THREE FishDuck Promises to Readers…

We will be the cleanest Oregon site with no ads or videos starting up to annoy you.

We will be the easiest Oregon site for mobile (Cell phone and Pad) users, as we want it fast for you.

We will be the safest Oregon site for everyone, as we monitor comments and assure that everyone is polite to all. (And we do want all your opinions!)

Simple, clean, safe and fast!