8:00 a.m: Sesame Street Meets the Teletubbies. Educational. A bird on a Harley teaches Tinky Spanky the meanings of words and numbers. The word for today is “ass-kicking”. The number for today is “9”. 9:00 a.m: Fantasy Island. Fictional island where, if you can dream it, Mr. Sark can make it so. On this week’s episode a savagely …
Why Do I Hate the Huskies?
I hate them because, without the Don James cheating years, they never actually dominated anything. I hate them because they knew they would win if they knocked our quarterbacks out of the game with cheap (and late, way late!) hits in the 80’s. I hate them because of the guy that chanted “It just doesn’t matter” when we took the …
I Was Soooo Scared
There I was, sitting at home reading the Good Book or setting the leg bone of a stray puppy, I don’t remember which, when there was a knock on the door. I answered it and the meanest man in the world was looking at me. I knew instantly it was one of a couple of my readers. I quickly took a …
Top 8 Reasons Why Duck Football is Better Than Sex
8. After a score at a Duck football game you get to hug more than one person. 7. Fans may gripe often about escalating ticket costs for Duck football, but it’s still much less expensive than a divorce attorney. 6. No one at a Duck football game cares about my…height 5. Between whistles, foghorns, and calls there is a lot …
Previewing Today’s Pac-12 Action
Good morning Fish Fans. I know that we are all still trying to catch our collective breaths after last night’s thrilling Washington State/UNLV game. The action on the field was end-to-end and non-stop, but the most exciting moment came late in the third quarter when entertainer extraordinaire Wayne Newton made an appearance in support of the Runnin’ Rebels. It is …
Week One Surprises
It’s only been one week since the 2012-2013 college football season got underway, but already there are surprises littered across the football landscape from sea to shining sea. It began Friday night in Palo Alto where the JUGGERNAUT San Jose Spartans were upset by Stanford 17-13. The Spartans, ranked 1,087th in the Sagarin system, were led by quarterback Corky McCorkindale. …
Opening Day Checklist
The bullets start flying for real tonight. Woke up today with a hint of the gameday nerves. I always feel better if I start preparing early. What do I need to get ready for the game against the Arkansas State Red Wolves? Lucky underwear. Last year I went with the old school Donald But this year I decided to add …
It Takes a Village: Bryan Bennett’s still vital role at Oregon
Yesterday morning the question to which Duck fans around the world had longed to hear an answer for was finally announced by Head Coach Chip Kelly. Redshirt freshman Marcus Mariota has been named the starting quarterback going into the 2012-2013 season. A quarterback competition that stretched out over seven months following an eye-opening performance in the April spring game was …
Quarterback Controversies Through the Ages
For the first time in several years there is doubt in the air. Bryan Bennett and Marcus Mariota enter the last two weeks of summer camp, each with an opportunity to lead the Mighty Green on to the field for the first snap of Game one of the 2012-2013 campaign. As predicted two weeks ago on this very page, a …
Shopping For a New Car
My wife and I are shopping for a new car. The first thing we had to do was decide just what we wanted the car to say about us. First we need something that reflects my status as a successful internet columnist/reporter. At the same time reflecting the living I’m actually making as a successful internet columnist reporter. I …
We Had Joy We Had Fun We Had Seasons in the Sun
Ah, the Terry Jacks classic tune. All about the passage of time and the stages of life. Life is about seasons. From the time we were young we measured the year by the school calendar. The start of school, Halloween, Christmas, the long haul to spring break (this was before “mid-winter break” existed…Good God kids are soft nowadays) , the …
Medal Ceremonies for Pac-12 Football Teams
The Opening Ceremonies for the Games of the XXX Olympiad took place last night amid thunderous applause and international acclaim. Thousands of athletes from around the world trooped through London’s Olympic Stadium, receiving the accolades of over 100,000 fans on hand for the event. Team USA, resplendent in their “Made in China” national togs, hope to dominate the medal count over the …