Is college football going down the drain? From the looks of today’s 11 flushable games, it well could be, if only temporarily. This is officially Week 0, presumably because of the number of zeroes that are playing. (And yes, that includes you, Florida Atlantic, and ex-Oregon coach Willie What’s-His-Name.) If it’s pomp, pageantry, and high drama you seek, you’re going …
I am a great believer in Thanksgiving. And why wouldn’t I be? It is the only holiday dedicated to life’s three primary joys, food, family, and football. Ah, the memories. Who can forget the year that your sister brandished a turkey leg at you until you changed the television from Bears/Lions to the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade? Your sister: Not …
March 17th was Saint Patrick’s Day, and unfortunately many of us were already holed up and unable to celebrate. However, in the spirit of that holiday and this green month of March, it seemed good to me (especially since my wife is Irish!) to offer my contribution in the form of Duck-themed limericks. The limerick is generally accepted to have …
Coach Willie Taggart once again waves his Florida magic wand to secure a major recruit. Kenny Johns, a 5-star mascot performer out of Gainesville, FL, has committed to the Oregon Ducks. Johns confirmed his commitment to 247Sports later that day: “Duck yeah! I’m a Duck!” The 5’10” Johns (ninth-ranked mascot per 247Sports Composite) is an excellent foot stomper and can reel off …
Spring is in the air, and you know what that means. It means it’s time for us to take our main squeeze by the hand, stroll on down to the park, lay out a blanket, and engage in our favorite pastime. Alright, alright, get your head out of the gutter, we’re talking about Oregon Ducks Spring Football! And here are …
Make no mistake about it. Without Matthew Knight Arena, the Ducks wouldn’t have Dana Altman, they wouldn’t have the talent, and they wouldn’t be in the final four. Or would they? Because in a disturbing alternate reality where MKA is still a piece of land with an old bakery on it, the Ducks would still be celebrating 2017 in the …
One weekend and a half in and your NCAA tourney bracket is shattered beyond belief. Why? Where did you go wrong? You calculated the assist/turnover ratio in neutral-site games played in December, but before Christmas. You searched the power rankings put out by ESPN, NPR, and The Food Network. This was supposed to be your year. Alas, you made just …
My friends … Kim Hastings was the humor writer at FishDuck.com for over four years, as every Saturday morning it was fun to check the site and have some laughs over a good cup of java. I really miss his humor, and as favor to me–he came back to offer some fun to brighten your day too. Charles Fischer My …
Hello friends. It’s good to talk with you again. As most of you know, I retired from FishDuck.com some time ago. I am enjoying the warm weather in my retirement community. The neighbors speak with an accent, making communication difficult. But that will come with time. Not long ago I was reading a magazine someone had smuggled, via their rectum, into …
1 ) DUCKS UNLIMITED IS TO DUCKS AS … a butcher shop is to hogs. a glue factory is to horses. a Korean restaurant is to dogs. 2 ) PUDDLES IS BEST KNOWN FOR … being androgynous. push up prowess. goosing Lee Corso. 3 ) WHICH COACHING STAFF HAS THE BEST HANDLE ON THE DUCKS OFFENSE? UCF the 49ers NEBRASKA …
Signing day is coming The SEC is getting fat Please put a top 300 dude In Coach Helf’s recruiting hat! If you don’t have a 300 Then a few 400’s will do If you don’t have any 400’s Puddles turns from green to blue! The annual mating ritual between high school football players and college football (‘CFB’) head coaches culminates on Wednesday, February 3, …
1. Is new UGA coach Kirby Smart’s nickname: a. ‘Get;’ b. ‘Not Too;’ c. ‘Wicked?’ 2. If no one showed for a Coach Saban press conference would he: a. yell at the Coke bottle; b. yell at the Dasani bottle; c. yell at both bottles? 3. If Nick Saban coaches ALABAMA …